The spectrum of introductions runs from those you’ve met countless times yet continue to accompany their outreached hand with a “so nice to meet you,” to that equally frustrating person who remembers every name, face and when/where/how you met and delights to remind you (watch out for these types…they gravitate towards politics).

If you fall into the “I can’t ever remember you” category, you frustrate me. If you are one of the blessed who remembers names, faces and location, and then the date and time where they intersect, I just might hate you. When meeting and greeting whether on business or pleasure, the purpose of introductions is to connect. The following rules just make life easier…

First off: Adjectives like “wimp,” “wet” and “weak” should not describe your handshake. Nothing more to say on that.

Graduating to the next level: If you are the kissing type, but American, kiss once on the cheek. If you are European, live abroad or feel expansive, go for the double cheek kiss. Love the intimacy. If you are Swiss (and my friend swears the Swiss do three for friends and family), I don’t care and please spare me the extra head toss. Three kisses is a mating ritual with heads flipping back and forth. Besides, who has the time? Whichever method you employ, be consistent and size up your situation. Fashionistas like to kiss. Bankers probably don’t.

Now onto a little suggestion to further world peace: re-introduce yourself. We live in a big world, and cross-referencing on Facebook can only get you so far. Please, don’t assume people remember you. Preempt the awkward moment by giving the necessary information first. It is so refreshing when someone walks up and says, “Hello John (insert own name here), good to see you again.”

Spare your audience the dreaded “Who is this?” moment. A nice touch for those of you who do remember names and faces is to throw out a detail from your earlier meeting or conversation: “Hello Mr. Smith. John Bevo. Good to see you again. I still can’t believe we watched such a huge win over Oklahoma last week.”

In the spirit of do unto others, an introduction is best executed when you sincerely and genuinely enjoy the opportunity to make the other’s acquaintance. Give your name, your attention and your interest, and you will acquit yourself admirably.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR —

I've traveled to India and watched the Hindus wake up Mother Ganges. I lived in Italy during September 11th when the Italians draped the Ponte Vecchio with an American flag, and I watched the Italians procrastinate until December 31st to transition from the Lire to the Euro. Tourists have pushed me off the sidewalk on 5th Avenue, and I have been laid off twice in one year. I've worked in the White House Social Office and welcomed guests on behalf of the President. I've been molested on the subway on my way to work but then been rescued by an undercover New York City police officer. I've eaten bagels in the Gehry-designed Conde Nast cafeteria and produced quarter of a million dollar photoshoots for Vogue. I've served food to the homeless in New York and delivered meals to the housebound in DC. I've run a half-marathon in Birmingham and been encouraged to 'keep up the good work' by a white-haired old man as he hauled by. I've toured the Three Gorges in China before the dam raised the water level and been told by a Beijing man that it is the Southern Chinese who eat 'little brown spotted dogs'. I've danced in the Orangerie at Versailles to Jimmy Buffett beneath a statue of Louis XIV singing 'Here Comes the Sun'. I've watched President Bush put his hand on Putin's shoulder and call him 'my good friend.' I've watched Russian tanks roll into Georgia on CNN. I've sent a note of condolence to the mother of a friend my age who died in September of a rare neurological disease. I am a great admirer of etiquette because good manners can transform you into royalty but inconsideration makes tatters from glamour. Manners are not a minefield. They are a 'lets try hard to make this other person more comfortable'. The true secret behind lovely etiquette and flawless entertaining is to make an effort. Yes: effort/strain/brawn/sweat/struggle/learn-the-rules/apply-them, and the energy expended absolutely pays off.

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